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Highlight Reel: Human Pork Chop (2001)

The police are searching through an apartment, and they find something terrible. In a Kitty doll, a human skull rolls out on the floor. What’s the story behind this human skull?

The police arrests some people they believe are behind the murder of a missing woman. Did they find the skull of the woman they are searching for or have they found a member of a Norwegian black metal band?

They interrogate the suspects, and the suspects tell the story of how they met the missing woman. It all started when the leader of the gang met the woman who needed a place to stay, and even though she had a poor attitude and a manly voice, he couldn’t say no because of her incredible charm. And she can earn him some money with her charm and looks. Okay, I didn’t mean that at all.

But she doesn’t have a pure soul or body, and problems arise when the customer isn’t satisfied with her and the way she looks. But come on, listen to her manly voice!

Then one night, when the kind man sleeps, she steals money from his wallet. When he finds out, he gets angry like the Incredible Hulk! She has ruined his plans for the weekend, and she will not get away with this!

Meanwhile, the woman with the manly voice is rude and lazy, and she tells us she has a baby! Poor baby! Nobody likes this woman. She’s a drug addict. She’s lazy and has a poor attitude. And she steals. She’s a horrible person! And she has a baby? Come on!

Then he finds the woman with the manly voice who has stolen his money! He runs after her, and she tries to escape, but he catches up to her, and she screams for help. A guy shows up, and he turns out to be her boyfriend, but he backs off when he understands he’s dealing with lunatics. The woman with the manly voice tells him she’s going to pay him soon, and he accepts the offer and lets her go.

While hanging around the corner and looking cool, two of his friends decide to play with a cute dog while the owner is in the store. They are bored, and they find an empty sack that belongs to Santa Claus. They do a horrible thing to the poor dog. I just hope that Santa Claus won’t find his missing sack and give it to a kid. That kid will be scarred for life! It’s not Heinz ketchup in the bag, you know.

But the woman with the manly voice doesn’t keep what she promised him, so he confronts her for the second time. She pays him some money, but she must get the rest of the money soon.

He sends his goons to her apartment to get the rest of the money. She can’t pay, so they take her to the kind man’s apartment, where he must teach her some manners. Remember, he is a patient man, but he can’t stand liars and a woman with a such poor attitude. He asks her if she wants some hot water, and she isn’t satisfied with his service. She’s never satisfied! I don’t like her! So since he’s a boxer, he finds out that he can use a human punching bag to train for his title fight against Mike Tyson.

After that hard workout, they need to relax with some drugs, and they are so kind to the human punching bag, who also gave it her all. She asks if it’s okay to go to the toilet, but she has another plan. She’s going to escape, but that didn’t work out. She got caught! So she has to be a little cat and find a spot on the floor to release her water. After that, she and a goon go out shopping, and they are not interested in paying since the woman with the manly voice steals everything. This woman is not a woman you should look up to. She’s a horrible person!

The leader keeps the woman in his apartment since he can’t trust her, and he can use her for other things so that she can pay him the money she owes him. There’s only one person in this group that shows some empathy, and that’s the leader’s wife. She is concerned, but the woman with the manly voice and poor attitude is living in her own bubble, and it’s hard to break through her thick skull.

The party people are again having a party, and they let the woman eat some leftovers. Then they tell her to rest in the refrigerator. She’s the King of comedy, and they all laugh. No one can say that Asians have good humor.

The leader still trains for his boxing match, and the woman still can’t pay him the money. Two of the goons want to play a game they call the dripping game with the woman, and she loves this game while she laughs. But the wife of the leader isn’t happy that they played the dripping game with her, so she chases them off. She also tries to talk some sense into the woman with the manly voice, but it’s not worth it. Give up woman. Her brain is made of stone! How many times have you tried so far?

The goons bring a customer to the woman with the manly voice, but the way she looks and her poor attitude disgust him. He’s not interested in her, and even if they paid him to party with her, he would have refused.

The goon tells her to take a bath, but she’s not listening to him. Again she shows her ugly side with her poor attitude. After he has talked some sense into her thick skull, she agrees to take a bath. The wife tells her to pay the money so she can go home, but the woman can’t pay since she’s lazy and refuses to work.

The young woman has to take a nasty dump, but he tells her that the toilet is clogged, but she doesn’t care. So that’s going to smell good. The sleepy creepy pervert guy is already fantasizing about the smell. Sniff it in, man!

The goon wakes the lazy woman up. He takes her to the bathroom and tells her to clean the toilet bowl. And that toilet is full of nasty things after the young woman took a dump. Since the woman has such a bad attitude, the goon figures out that she can take a bath in the toilet bowl so that she doesn’t smell as much. Since he has a good day today, he also tells her to eat some leftovers that the other woman left her. So I think it’s fair to say that she helped with the housecleaning today. Don’t you agree?

So now she’s satisfied, and she needs to go to sleep. The goon has arranged a new bedroom for her, and no one can say that she isn’t treated nicely. Good night, lazy woman.

The next day they find that the lazy woman has passed out, but they believe she’s faking it, and they take her to her bedroom to rest. She wakes up, and she hears voices. It turns out that they are going out to drink and have a good time, and she pretends she’s asleep. When she knows they are gone, she looks for some drugs, and she’s in heaven. I’m pretty certain she didn’t pay for it, though.

She thinks back to when she told her grandmother she was pregnant and all of her lazy and unrealistic dreams. This is the scene that tries to humanize this lazy woman with a poor attitude. It’s such a terrible scene, but I guess the people behind the movie tried to act like they cared when making it. They never cared about the victim, and you shouldn’t either if you are watching this movie. You should care about the real person that this happened to, and not a fictional character with a manly voice. This movie was made for one thing only, to make money!

The party people return, and she tries to sneak out of the room, but the leader knows what she has been doing. He’s upset again, and this time he is going to teach her a lesson! He smashes something that I don’t know what is, and he puts it in a small bag so that she thinks it’s drugs when she’s going to steal his drugs again. And after that, they leave the apartment to party all night long.

And the lazy woman is at it again. She takes the fake drug and fires it up. Then the party people return. They find the woman unconscious on the floor, but they don’t care. They go to bed. It’s morning again, and she’s still lying on the floor, and then they discover she is dead.

They blame each other that they were too rough on her. They place her inside the refrigerator. They drink and play a card game. What are they going to do with her body?

The leader goes to the store to buy things he needs to dispose of her body because she can’t live in the refrigerator. He’s a smart man. No one can take that away from him. So they put her in the bathtub and do their thing. Chop chop.

They dump most of her body parts in the trash, and they cook the rest. And no, they are not cannibals! I guess they wanted to get rid of her fingerprints and stuff like that. And the last thing they cook is her head.

Suddenly there is a knock on their door, and it’s the police who are investigating a criminal case that happened in an apartment below them. The police ask them if they have seen anything or heard anything, but we know they haven’t.

The leader tries to find a place where he can hide the woman’s skull, and he finds the big Kitty doll. They are losing it, and a goon sees things that aren’t real. He sees the woman’s face, but it’s the face of the young woman who took a dump he’s seeing. Before they leave the apartment, the leader tells the group that if someone tells the police, he’s going to kill them.

It turns out that the young woman in the group couldn’t live with this murder, so it was she who told the police! The leader and his two goons got sentenced to life in prison.

Again, don’t take this movie seriously. It was never meant to be taken seriously.

The end.

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